As usual my luvlies, here’s how my week went, in no particular order:
- It’s been de-cluttering week at my big fat house this week, and I’ve actually got things OUT of the house instead of spending a week shuffling boxes around. Of course that has involved some, shall we say frustrating times in Facebook Marketplace. Being a Life Coach ‘n all, I’ve decided the best policy is not to respond:
Me: “Camera £200 – collect only, and NO offers.”
Response: “£100 ?” ….
Me: “Rug £20, collect only”
Response: “Can I have more pictures of it?”
Response: “Don’t suppose you can deliver?”
2. We’re going to have a flake of snow this afternoon at about 3pm. In the UK that means everyone leaves work at noon, the trains stop running and the Daily Mirror digs out their “Blizzard Chaos” template and hits ‘publish’. When it’s snowing is the time I laugh hardest (and post ‘meanwhile, in Canada’ memes).
3. Dexter and Willow, my long suffering masters, now have their own weekly slot on Instagram. I need you to promise me that if I start dressing up my cats that you will put a hit out on me. Promise?
4. On at least one day this week, I’ve almost put instant coffee granules on my breakfast because I’m thinking about a mindfulness article I want to write. There’s a joke in there somewhere.
5. Can you really measure success by how many stalkers you have? I have one on Twitter, who sends me “Hello” every two days. Does that count?
6. Southern Resident Killer Whales, ‘L Pod’ have had a baby. It’s cuteness is, as always, legendary. It’s also important since their neighbors, ‘J-Pod’, are starving to extinction. Because humans. Have followed their progress for many years.
7. It never ceases to amaze me that I can be almost half a century old, eat one slice of angel cake and still get zits like a teenager. Angel cake zits. I mean, there should be a warning on the pack. ‘Angel cake causes teen zits’. That’s one less thing I can’t eat.
8. Gerard never replied. I get it. Totally. Understand. Yep. Can’t imagine screaming his name out in bed anyway. #LifeGoals
9. It’s time for some deep inward-thinking when you realise that the only reason you don’t sell your house and move into a cabin near the sea is the quality of the wifi there. #FirstWorldProblems