They Think It’s All Over
So, we survived Christmas with the usual annual feeling of ‘wow, that was over quickly’ (that’s what she said). Now we have that awkward in-between part where we immerse ourselves in the New Year Sales crowds and buy more stuff we could possibly do without and also contemplate what we’re doing for New Year. We’re also perhaps going to be considering our New Year Resolutions. But,
How are New Years Resolutions a thing? Well, according to Wikipedia, resolutions originate from promises made to the Ancient Gods in the first month of the year. The Romans, for instance, made promises to Janus, the God of Beginnings and Endings etc. (I’m sure he’s happy to have the accolade of ‘etc.’) in January which was the month named after him. They exchanged figs and honey and cheerful good wishes.
New Year Resolutions
- In the modern day, the most popular resolutions include:
- Improve physical well-being: eat healthy food, lose weight, exercise more, eat better, drink less alcohol, quit smoking, stop biting nails, get rid of old bad habits.
- Improve mental well-being: think positive, laugh more often, enjoy life.
- Improve self: become more organized, reduce stress, be less grumpy, manage time, be more independent, perhaps watch less television, play fewer sitting-down video games.
- Spend less time on social media (such as Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Tumblr etc.) – yeah that’ll work…
So if, up to the point of January 1st, we did not resolve to do this, why would it work on January 1st?
I think it may be because we possibly have feelings of guilt that another year has passed and we haven’t done these things. On this day we have a feeling that there’s a whole year ahead, and so much can be achieved in it. That’s not going to make you more resolved on January 1st.
You first need to change your attitude about these things, or you’re setting yourself up for failure. Attitude = Mindset (the latest buzzword) and this is really how you feel in your core about a subject. It’s your viewpoint, how you apply yourself to a situation or thing.
So really, what I think would be a great thing to do on January the first (if you have to pick a date), is to start preparing for what ever it is you want to achieve. If your mindset is not great about eating less, have a sit down and consider what it might be like, if your attitude was different.
- If my attitude was different, I would probably not buy that double-latte-super-salted-caramel-venti-ice-cream-donut-venti-decaf. I’d want to try black coffee.
- If my attitude was different, I would learn to recognize whether I was hungry or thirsty, I’d want to drink some water, first. Out of a champagne glass.
- If my attitude was different, I might consider leaving out in-between snacks. I’d do something else instead. Like meditate for five minutes.
or whatever it is. In order for an attitude to change, you have to try other things. And you have to stick with it. If someone said “black coffee” to me fifteen years ago I’d have screwed up my face and backed away slowly. But I tried it, I stuck with it, and now I actually prefer it. Sure, I still have a latte occasionally (really, I’m not averse to any kind of coffee!!) – but my ‘normal’ is black now.
You can change your attitude about anything that way. Learn more about the alternative things/views/ways of treating people and try other things. If you’re a complete cow in the morning, for instance, try something else. Try saying something nice to someone, or humming a tune in your head (like, ‘Copacabana’) while making your coffee.
If you are dead-set on making a New Years Resolution, make it a small one. Make it a day-long one, for instance. ‘Today, I’m going to be nice to my brother.’ – just make it achievable.
My New Years Resolution last year was to NOT marry Gerard Butler. See? achievable. I nailed that one.
Samantha is a well-liked Life Coach, specializing in self-esteem and body image with qualifications in Mindfulness, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and Skilled Helping. She speaks on several panels around the internet in this regard.
Samantha Dee is the Author of ‘My Big Fat…Fat’ and ‘The Thirty Day Wellness Journal’. Her next book, ‘My Big Fat…Kitchen’ is due out soon.
Samantha Dee did an amazing job at helping me to figure out where I want to go. She’s kind, supportive, and an amazing listener. Thank you for the great service.
14th December 2018
Have just had an amazing and oh so inspiring breakthrough coaching session with Samantha. She has created such peaceful and safe space for me to share my challenges and get clarity and reassurance on my direction. Thanks so much Sam;) Gosia
10th November 2018