My Big Fat Blog: As usual my luvlies, here’s how my week went, in no particular order:
1. Ridiculous tune stuck in my head #4578 ‘Stayin’ Alive’ by the BeeGees
‘Ah, ah, ah, ah’ (while strutting please, thanks).
2. What-O my lovelies! did you miss me? I know, but I only missed one Friday…I think. Email me your tardy slips. I’ll think of a suitable self-punishment.
3. It’s been a bumpy couple of weeks, what with all the storms and Mercury-fricken-Retrograde I’ve been hiding – it’s a new thing, like the Ice Bucket Challenge. I never did that.
4. Some of those charity bags and boxes ACTUALLY left my house the other day. It only took a couple of months. Much more to get rid of; I should make it a daily task if I could just get past the ‘sit down and have a cuppa’ thing I do most mornings. #LifeGoals
5. We’re TWO days into spring! that means I’ve demoted my outfits from five arctic layers of socks and knitwear to three. Perhaps by June I’ll get down to two. Weather’s very ‘blah, I can’t be arsed’ at the moment – which means that I have been ‘blah, I can’t be arsed’. Note to self: more Berocca.
6. You might find me a bit ridiculous, but the reason I haven’t been doing the ‘mask of the week’ is that I keep most of my masks in the fridge. In the current clime, this would be akin to sticking a sheet of ice on my face. I’m OLD, I’m one step away from buying those electric heated bootees you can stick your feet in.
7. Things you didn’t know about me #345234 – I lurve Poker! Well, I’m not a PokerStar yet but I did come 41st out of over 4000 players in a tournament the other week. It didn’t win me $28,000,000 or anything but you know, I was quite proud. Not sure I’d be great at a table, I don’t really have much of a poker face!
8. Was watching my two terrors having a Mexican Stand Off last night, they literally froze in place for five minutes, before one of them pounced on the other. Ah, the secret life of cats. Wouldn’t it be great if we were like that with people. It would make Office life so much more interesting.
9. Next on my list of spring cleaning is to purge my house of the mountains of alcohol I appear to have accumulated over the years. I am partial to a twice-yearly vodka, or a gin with my bestie once in a while. But really, peach schnapps and black absinthe? Errr, nah. I have a nasty habit of getting my boobs out on absinthe. On account of the fact I’m pushing fifty, I think it’s time to retire the old girls.