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My Big Fat Blog

Hazmat Suits and Baggy Bras – My Week in List Form

My Big Fat Blog: As usual my luvlies, here’s how my week went, in no particular order:

Hazmat Suits and Baggy Bras - My Week in List Form1. Sorry I’ve been a bit tardy with my ‘Fridays’, my Doctor decided to experiment with my meds and I ended up, shall we say, ‘not in the mood’ for writing. Or anything, actually.

2. During said experiment, I went for an interview for  job ‘a’, only to turn up and get interviewed for job ‘n’. Then turned down on the basis that I wouldn’t make a good ‘n’. No shit, Sherlock.

3. Still continuing with the ‘Korean skin care’ craze. There are eight steps in my routine (the more the better, according to Korea skin care gurus), and I’m down to eight masks in the fridge from sixteen. We better hurry up with the pajama party, girls.

4. Because of the meds experiment, I haven’t cut my grass in weeks. My back yard now looks like a scene from Jumanji.

5. Had a day out with the girls this week. The kind of friends you can meet up with after a few years and it’s like we’ve never been apart. I’d rather have a few great friends than several that are less meaningful. We talked about menopause and bras; old bras, new bras and baggy bras. It was GREAT. (also…I WALKED right on PAST the Chanel AND ‘La Mer’ counters in the store we were in. Very proud of myself). I DID discover that my all-time favourite fragrance ever has a ‘blue’ version. It was de-fucking-lish. Next time, Hermes. Next time.

6. Popcorn doesn’t ‘agree with me’ but I can’t stop eating it. The next day giphy1I have to use the bathroom in a hazmat suit.

7. Diet review: Noom: A plan put together by leading psychologists, nutritionists and behavioral scientists etc. Have a free trial which is very easy to cancel. For this weight loss tool, you have to install their app onto your phone. Their ‘diet’ is based around eating more of the food with a high water content. I don’t mind that idea, but the app pings you at least three times a day remind you about logging meals and insists you weigh yourself EVERY day. It’s £26’ish a month after the trial. Verdict: Fine if you want to be bombarded about food and weighing for what feels like 24-7. Meditate, love YOURSELF, and go live your life instead.

masks8. Mask of the week is Laneige night sleeping mask and lip sleeping mask; £30ish quid for both, including delivery. Recommended by YouTube Korean Skincare video (I’m really not that gullible, honestly). I was actually pleasantly surprised. The face mask is almost like a gel, and you just slap it on at night. The lip mask is really just a thick lip balm but has a really nice silky consistency. Haven’t noticed too much difference with the lips really but the face mask is taking a coveted second place to my Vit-E Mask from The Body Shop (which has so far been untouchable for night-sleeping masks). Sam recommends.

9. I can’t have a dog. I’m just away from home so much (when working). That, though, doesn’t stop me from looking at puppies for sale for two hours every so often and researching what breeds I should buy. I turn into a cutesey wootsy mess. What I decided on (aside from the mini wire-haired daschund that I’m HAVING come hell or high water) is a Sprocker (I researched)…..You know how something’s so fucking cute you get mad? Like,

Christ on a stick, that’s TOO cute!

Cuteness level: Bat-shit crazy

Quote of the week:

“Be where you are; otherwise, you will miss your life.”  


How was YOUR week?

form-fitting undergarment designed to support or cover the wearer’s breasts. Bras are designed for a variety of purposes, including enhancing a woman’s breast

Author of 'My Big Fat...Fat' out now on Amazon

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